The Year that Passed...

Well, it's 4:16 on a Sunday afternoon, it's raining and I just got home from the Saltmine.

I met some Saltmine inmates for a breakfast meeting (they are awesome and humbled me by offering me money to show up... How sad is it that I'm the teacher and can't afford gas so four juniors pooled their resources to make sure I could attend a meeting with them? I love those guys, I'm going to miss them next year).

Then I went up to Saltmine Central and inputted my grades for three hours (for once I'm done with them early...they're due tomorrow).

Next, I roller bladed for an hour in the Saltmine environs...tank top, black jeans, pig tails, loud music and all...

And while I was doing that, my mind was racing faster than my feet... Moving me backward and forward from past to present...

Every year about this time I start to become more and more withdrawn. I feel the need to pull back inside my sea-urchin-like shell so that when it's time to say goodbye in June I will be protected by my tough exoskeleton.

It's hard.

The greatest thing about teaching is getting to know so many fabulous people.

The worst thing about teaching is having to say goodbye to those fabulous people, knowing that if I've done my job, most of them will go away forever...

It's harder to say goodbye to some of them more than others.

The absolute toughest part is never knowing if I've really taught them something, if I've done my job as best I can... I've always believed that for me personally, teaching is more a function of who I am than the material I impart. I think that the connection is what ensures that Inmates will actually listen...

But then someone will say, in a fit of pique..."I haven't learned anything."

And I beat myself up about it.

Still...I continue to put on the armor, wade in, do my best and hope every day for a good result...

I hope it's enough.

I already miss the Inmates.

How could I ever do anything else with my life but this job?

It has me by the short hairs.

I am the Saltmine's wench.

But I kind of like it. Does that make me weird?

I'm just sayin'.